Feburary 1.0

Summer is almost over. And that makes me sad. And scared. But mostly sad. I feel like I've wasted the weather. I haven't been to be beach enough. I haven't basked in the sun enough. I haven't, I don't even know, appreciated it enough. I'm just sad that soon the sun will dissapear and the horrible cold winds will come to whip hair around our faces and chill us to the bone. And the gray. It makes me depressed. I'd much rather summer when the sky sparkles and the sun is so cheerful. Where the grass looks especially green and lush and the sky has a million shades of blue.

The end of summer also means the back to school. Back to listening and learning and being quiet. Back to deadlines and blue pens and missing important points. Back to sitting through an hour or so of the drone of imaginary bees and the whispers and the glow of under desk texting. Unfortunately I am exaggerating. It's not that bad. It's just different from the carefree, unstructed, free flowing days of holidays. And I'm not liking it one bit... and I haven't even started yet.

Summer is however not over yet. There is still time. And things have been achieved. Recently I ventured to the Island of Phillip. Some of my awesome uni peoples and I nipped down for four days of not a-hell-of-a-lot. We sat enthralled through episodes of skins, we discussed the important matters of desalination plants, we discussed the unimportant matters of the correct use of eyeliner, we sat around the fire and discussed sex and sexually related topics, we attempted to find a song to mix with wonderwall, we walked to the fish and chip shop, twice...and it was closed, twice, and we read multiple copies of zoo magazine whilst commenting on how (un)attractive many of the girls featured actually were.

January 1.0

"Go right at the first stoplight, I'll be outside waiting for you"

But how long can you wait? When does it stretch from possibility to impossibility? I love the saying "I'll wait for you forever if I have to". It's so romantic, but in truth would anyone really wait forever? And once 'forever' had passed would it really live up to the expectations that had been set? Things work in mysterious ways. I don't know if I believe that God created the universe, or even if that a bunch of stuff colliding somehow miraculously created living beings. Existence seems a little... too difficult and intricate to be happening sometimes. And it's scary. It's all scary. Life. Being. The whole lot of it. You're supposed to act in a certain way but who says that's the right way? Is it merely ideological hegemony (a term we learnt about in media) where a ruling class in society creates 'rules' which are followed by the rest of us mere mortals. We all call green 'green' for example, but is it really? And who says that what we see as green, isn't seen as our purple by someone else? We're all individuals, or so we're told. But really aren't we all humans? All created from the same "mould"?

But back to waiting and the such. I have a wonderful thing, but sometimes I see and hear things that make me believe that it is really such a rare thing that I have to constantly check that it hasn't disappeared on me. Slipped out of my grip while my back was turned and I was distracted. But then I realise it's safe and I'm pretty sure it will always be safe. But I still like to check. It's still nice to know sometimes. Just so you appreciate it that little bit more.